Even Now

I realized something while watching a movie recently. It wasn’t a Hallmark movie, but it was along those lines. You know, one where you figure out the ending within the first 10 minutes but still get sucked into the story anyway. It got to the climactic point of the plot where everything looks like it’s falling apart, and I thought to myself, “Ugh, this is so annoying! We all know what’s going to happen, why does this part have to take forever? Why can’t we just get to the happy ending without all this drama?”

I realized that sometimes that’s exactly how I feel about my life. In fact, that’s how I feel right now. I wish I could skip all the hard parts and all the uncertainty and just get to the “happy ending.” The difference is, I have no idea what the ending is going to be. Real life is a lot more complicated than movie scripts.

What gets me through times like this is knowing that God loves me. I know that probably sounds really trite, but it’s not. No matter what happens, God’s love for me is the one thing that anchors me, the one thing I always have to hold onto, the one thing I can and will never doubt. And if I believe that God knows, wants, and is able to accomplish what’s best for me – and I do, because it’s true – then I truly have nothing to worry about. Even when it feels like I do.

Below is the chorus and bridge of a song I wrote that speaks to this. Let this be my statement of faith in a God whose ways I don’t understand, but whose heart I trust entirely. Even now.

Even now, I know You could if You wanted to
But even now, I will still trust You if You don’t
Even now, I still believe Your plans are full of love for me
So how could I doubt, even now?

I will not doubt Your Love for me
You fully know what I can’t see
No, I will not doubt Your Love for me
You fully know what I can’t see

And even now, I still believe Your plans are full of love for me
So how could I doubt, even now?
Lord, forgive my doubt

[March 5, 2020]

Postcards From The Past
Posted in Melody Dawning Blog
1 Comment » for Even Now
  1. Yeah. that’s what I was exploring for.. thanks. Cahra Wendell Toh

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